Got me a hound dog. . .razor paws;
Siccing him on Santa Claus,
Comes down my chimney and then annoys
Me and my missus, so—cur deploys.
Go, go, go, go for that schmoe,
Schmoe, schmoe, schmoe—red head to to-oe!
Got me a hound dog—sic, sic, sic
Him on that cookie thief, old Saint Nick.

Then comes the shocking: this mutt ain’t well-
versed in how Santa’s expelled.
Just sits there bawling, with runny eyes;
Santa flips him off. . .back to the skies.
No! No! No! This mutt is slow—
Go, go, go, it’s gotta go-o.
Nuts to this hound dog, thick, thick thick.
“Pound,” I say, “Give me something to sic!”

next year:

I had been thoughtless—to fill the bill
I needed something that’s bred to kill
With a vice-like jaw that won’t go slack
On which I can call for an attack.
Go, go, go, go for that schmoe,
Schmoe, schmoe, schmoe—red head to to-oe!
Got me a pound dog—Pit, Pit, Pit
Chows down on Nicky. . .that’s all she writ.