I have a little Weeble,
Of plastic it is made.
It won't stay horizontal,
So down it can't be laid.

Oh Weeble, Weeble, Weeble,
Of plastic you are made.
You seem depressed and lonely
And down you're never laid.

My Weeble hopes he finds a
Nice young Weeble lady.
But I think he'll freak out when
He sees her stand to pee.

Oh Weeble, Weeble, Weeble,
You might find a lady.
But like The Crying Game chick,
Girl Weebles stand to pee.

My Weeble isn't handsome;
It's neither tall nor thin.
It looks like Humpty Dumpty
And has a double chin.

Oh Weeble, Weeble, Weeble,
You're short and not so thin.
I think you should try Slimfast
And lose that double chin.

My Weeble is a kind and
Upstanding friend to me,
And though he sometimes wobbles,
He gets back up, you see.

Oh Weeble, Weeble, Weeble,
My shrink says you're like me,
And that I view my life through
Your strange analogy.