Oh, yes, it's the great song pander
sent out to the girl I love well.
Her need is such, get approved so much.
She's lovely, and we all can tell.

Oh, yes, it's the great song pander
a-drifting on out to her zone.
I play the game, but to my real shame
the distance keeps us both alone.

Too real is this feeling of make-believe.
Too real when I feel all this cross-country zeal.

(Oh, oh...)

Yes, it's the great song pander.
Just laugh with this song, like a clown.
I seem to be what I'm not, you see:
The consort of elf with the crown
pretending that her love's around.

Too real is this feeling of make-believe.
Too real when I feel all this cross-country zeal!

(Oh, oh...)

Yes, it's the great song pander.
Just laugh with this song, like a clown.
I seem to be what I'm not, you see:
The consort of elf with the crown...

Pretending that her love's around.
(Love's... a... round!)