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Song Parodies -> "She's Not Available"
Original Song Title:
"It's Not Unusual"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Tom Jones
Parody Song Title:
"She's Not Available"
Parody Written by:
Michael Pacholek
The Lyrics
Tom Jones is from Wales. As is the unrelated subject of the first verse. For the record: I hope her elderly husband makes a full recovery. I want her to be happy. I'd prefer it if she were happy with me, but it's time to move on. The other six women cited in this song aren't returning my calls either.
(instrumental opening)
She's not available, she is loved by other one.
She's not available, she has fun with other one.
But when I see my Catherine with that other one
it's not unusual to see my cry, I wanna die.
She's not available, she's wed to Marc Anthony.
She married him even though his history
shows he weds gorgeous chicks, then there's adultery.
She's not available.
No, not Mary-Louise.
No nookie in the weeds.
Another woman I must find.
Jolie's shacked up with Pitt.
I thought she had some wit.
Why can't that crazy chick be mi-i-i-ine?
(instrumental break)
She's not available, someone else will swizz her beatz.
She's not available, Alba won't give me her treats.
But if you tell me Justin Long's gone for one more time
it's not unusual to find out I'm in love with Drew!
Whoa-whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh...
(fadeout)
She's not available, she is loved by other one.
She's not available, she has fun with other one.
But when I see my Catherine with that other one
it's not unusual to see my cry, I wanna die.
She's not available, she's wed to Marc Anthony.
She married him even though his history
shows he weds gorgeous chicks, then there's adultery.
She's not available.
No, not Mary-Louise.
No nookie in the weeds.
Another woman I must find.
Jolie's shacked up with Pitt.
I thought she had some wit.
Why can't that crazy chick be mi-i-i-ine?
(instrumental break)
She's not available, someone else will swizz her beatz.
She's not available, Alba won't give me her treats.
But if you tell me Justin Long's gone for one more time
it's not unusual to find out I'm in love with Drew!
Whoa-whoa-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh...
(fadeout)
And, no, those rumors you've heard about me and the Kardashian sisters are not true. And while I do spend a bit of time on the actual Jersey Shore, that was NOT me on that magazine cover proposing to Snooki. She makes the Kardashians look like teetotalers.
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
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| 1 | 2 | 2 | 2 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 8 | 8 | 8 |
User Comments
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Michael - Fine job. The first thing I plan on doing if I ever am put in charge of the universe is to get you and Catherine together. Perhaps you two can go on a double date with this old guy and Carrie Fisher. 'Til then, the best I can do is 5 - 5 - 5. ;D
Still carrying a torch for the Zeta, eh? Since you're both named Mike, maybe you could fill in as the extra mike..the next time she sings
A love lost is a sad love song gained. A cynic would say that women are only good for one thing: lyrics.
Oh, Patrick, women are good for much more than that.
I get the "she's not available" answer every time I make calls at my work (I just started my job as a telephone sales rep). Anyways, I echo all comments above and some women do play hard to get sometimes! Great work and 5's!
Lord Pacholek, Lady CZJ will be quite busy carrying for her Knight, as he goes thru his treatments . . . I wish him well, Sir .
You get the "fives", though Zeta's dressed to the nines...
Be careful what you wish for, it might come true. Or, as a married friend of mine use to say; "being married to a good looking woman is like having a subscription to Playboy Magazine, only it has the same centerfold every month, every year, every damn decade!"...
True story: Last night, Michael Douglas was on David Letterman. As I do not like either one, I didn't watch it. Fortunately, Jay Leno had both Kim Kardashian (sort-of mentioned in the closing comments, and Jay had his band play ZZ Top's song "Tush") and Norah Jones! (He also had Barney Frank, which kind of cancels them out.) Then Jimmy Fallon had his "Fever Pitch" costar Drew Barrymore! Timing is everything!
To the jack*ss who one bombed this - (channeling Joseph Welch at the McCarthy hearings) Have you no sense of decency? Have you no shame, sir? Michael - I've got your blind right side, buddy! ;D
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