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Song Parodies -> "The Guy With Sleep Apnea"
Original Song Title:
"The Girl From Ipanema"
Original Performer:
Stan Getz and Astrud Gilberto
Parody Song Title:
"The Guy With Sleep Apnea"
Parody Written by:
Rick Cormier
The Lyrics
Like the original, this parody is meant to be sung with a slight Portugese accent. Apnea is pronounced with the stress on the second syllable, instead of on the first.
Short and bald and old and grumpy
The guy with sleep apnea goes driving
And, as he cruises,
Sometimes he snoozes. Uh-ohhhh
When he drives, it's like he's hammered
He swerves hard left, while softly snoring
Some naps he catches
Result in patches. Uh-ohhhh
Oh...but he needs sleep so badly
Ra..cing, headlong t'ward a taxi
Lookslike his end will be messy
Loud snorts wake him in time to avoid
The crash
Cabbie screams, "Hemorrhoid!"
Bleary-eyed and driving drowsy
The guy with sleep apnea is passing
Through "Lawn and Garden" at Sears
But he doesn't see
Oh he is dreaming of boinking
Two blondes in thongs, he's a porn king
Ah he's been bad, someone spank him
Thirty seconds is all that he needs
He's back on the street, he proceeds
Mouth agape and head back, lolling
The guy with sleep apnea is idling
The light is changing to green
But, he never sees
"Cause he's counting sheep
He's catching some zees
He drives fast asleep
The guy with sleep apnea goes driving
And, as he cruises,
Sometimes he snoozes. Uh-ohhhh
When he drives, it's like he's hammered
He swerves hard left, while softly snoring
Some naps he catches
Result in patches. Uh-ohhhh
Oh...but he needs sleep so badly
Ra..cing, headlong t'ward a taxi
Lookslike his end will be messy
Loud snorts wake him in time to avoid
The crash
Cabbie screams, "Hemorrhoid!"
Bleary-eyed and driving drowsy
The guy with sleep apnea is passing
Through "Lawn and Garden" at Sears
But he doesn't see
Oh he is dreaming of boinking
Two blondes in thongs, he's a porn king
Ah he's been bad, someone spank him
Thirty seconds is all that he needs
He's back on the street, he proceeds
Mouth agape and head back, lolling
The guy with sleep apnea is idling
The light is changing to green
But, he never sees
"Cause he's counting sheep
He's catching some zees
He drives fast asleep
Your Vote & Comment Counts
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 18 | 18 | 18 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
Great title idea and "Sound-Like" phrase...Very funny, loved the "Sears, Lawn and garden" line..Conjures up an image of Mr. Magoo in a car....Did you have Patrick Kennedy in mind?..I'm apt to give you "5's"
I think I dated that guy. 555
only fell asleep once reading it....wonderful concept
Heh heh
5s for the brilliant title alone...I'm shooting the video in my head already!
What Kristof said about the title. This parody getz you fives.
hehe hehe
chortle snort sssnnrrrrzzzzk
I can totally relate; I have those same dreams. Kudos on everything here, particularly the title.
LMAO Rick - "Oh… he is dreaming of boinking Two… blondes in thongs, he's a porn king" ('out' of thongs, I presume you meant, but it wouldn't have paced) - very creative and wacky - just like you, mate ;-) - 555
Thanks, AFW, Ravyn, alvin, JD, Kristof, John A. Barry, Adagio, JD again?, Mr.com and Stu. Stu, I'm sure he would have helped them out, had he lasted more than 30 seconds :-)
That was gr............................ zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.......................... -yawns, awakes- Great
(ABC3) I had trouble singing my way through stanza 3, but otherwise great idea and execution.
Definitely funny -- and true!--MM
loved it nuff z
(ABC3G) Rick, you know I love, love, LOVE your work, but this one (and only this one) just didn't do it for me. But, it's not your writing, it's that my sense of humor is skewed on the subject since my wife is hooked to a machine to help her breath (she has sleep apnea), and I've darned near been killed more than once from falling asleep at the wheel (just really friggin' tired and too damned stupid to stop for rest).
That said, the pacing is great, and so were the lines "Oh… he is dreaming of boinking/Two… blondes in thongs, he's a porn king"
That said, the pacing is great, and so were the lines "Oh… he is dreaming of boinking/Two… blondes in thongs, he's a porn king"
(ABC) 10cm CPAP, see above!
(ABC-G) This definitely wasn't a snorefest! Had me grinning the whole way.
(abc3-g) loved this one - see above, and LOL for your reply, Rick
(ABC3G) see above. I remember this one well. Great stuff!
Thanks all.
Agri: I suppose I should have marked the verses and choruses to eliminate that confusion. Sorry.
Sorry to have hit a nerve, Jack, I understand.
Agri: I suppose I should have marked the verses and choruses to eliminate that confusion. Sorry.
Sorry to have hit a nerve, Jack, I understand.
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