Long distance information give me Washington, DC
Hook me to the party who'll be listening to me
I am not with Al Qaeda, and Osama ain't my boss
But, guess my right to privacy is so much applesauce

Real spy information you'll sure gather from these calls
Like what I take on pizza and where I buy my golf balls
The last name of my doctor and my blood pressure rate
Sexy things I tell my wife when I'll be working late

Big spy information, like this telemarketing
Swear words I might mumble when no one is answering
Those calls I make on Sunday, dialing good friends dear to me
I guess they're all important down in Washington DC

Looks like Big Brother's with us in the dome upon the hill
If government's connected maybe they should foot the bill
So, when each month has ended and Ma Bell makes her plea
I'll just mark it "Forward Please To Washington DC..

I'll just mark it "Forward Please To Washington DC